Chapter 68 Haruto
Surely, this was some kind of joke. And if it wasn\'t, well… no, it was anyway. A joke. And so there was one question: How would this whole situation be a joke, hm? In what aspect? What should I focus on to see through this whole prank? As it somehow had to be, I needed to concentrate on that. And I was positive that, in the end, answering that question will give me more understanding of my situation. So, okay, I thought, how would it be a joke, a prank, a gag for some TV program, or whatever, really?
Jokes, I had seen plenty of them. Jokes of this very kind, that is correct. They\'re mostly called pranks. And so, the place I find myself in, at present, doesn\'t feel like a prank in any way to me. I can assure you this. Still though, I\'d break the whole bad joke down, and scold my way out of this prank and whatever crew of senseless people is behind it. That kind of prank was no good to me or anyone. The tricks of the prank simply looked way too real—that was bad for us and our regular highschoolers\' hearts.
"H-Haruto!" Someone called my name. "I-I-It really happened! Dude! It\'s crazy! We really got isekai\'d, haven\'t we!?" The guy next to me, Kimon, yelled so intensely, with a huge grin plastered on his face. He turned all around us and kept yelling how crazy this whole thing was, how he\'d always dreamed of such a wild fantasy actually happening. His excitement, as opposed to mine, could hardly be contained.
"W-Would you please not yell!" I shouted back. That kid, he fell for it so easily. He seriously had a problem, though. The excitement is way over the top. I bet even if this whole being taken away to another world, appearing in a castle and stuff, surrounded by a bunch of medieval royal-like people, Kimon would be the first to cry for dear home.
"I-I\'m trying to make sense of this whole prank thing, here! Don\'t you fall for it! It\'s a trap! If you do, ...I, uh... I\'ll have to act like I don\'t know you!" You know, the kinds of situations where you\'re too embarrassed to even \'know\' someone. Well, that\'d be it. That might have been ridiculous, but I\'d really do it. That guy, Kimon, Mon-key if you flip the two syllables, was the kind of guy you didn\'t want to know.
Aaah, but he\'s still a precious friend, I thought, conflicted. Should it really be okay if I did that…? No matter! Is there time to think about that? Unlike my friend, I tried to keep my calm. My calm, my cool, my composure—whatever I could keep I kept, in this situation. It really was crazy, after all. I needed to get it together. And my calm was the top priority here. To properly assess the situation and move accordingly. I needed to be lucid—
"What do you even mean, \'isekai\'d\'!?"
Kimon wouldn\'t stop fidgeting and squirming like a crazy worm. He was just like his kid self back when we had been visiting an amusement park for the first time. What a pain he was. "It reaaally happeeeeened! I say this: we\'ve been chosen! Choseeen, I tell you! Chosen and teleported to another world! We\'re… It finally happened! W-What\'d they call it in tensura?! Isekaijin! Otherworlders, right?! That\'s… just what we are! Oh, dude! It\'s so great! \'You even get it?! H-Hey! Haruto! I\'m talking to you there!"
Kimon interrupted my thought process. Jeez, that guy ticked me off. What a disturbance. I already was a lot disturbed, and he was only adding to it. Adding fuel to the fire, he continued to press me with questions, asking me if the moron I was had any idea of what we were going through, what it was all called, why it was so great, and why I was spoiling it all by being so stern and tight. He was the actual moron here. I was ready to curse again but thought better of it.
"Stop shaking me like a fool, man! Lay off," I scolded. "I\'m trying to make sense of this… whole… nonsensical circus going around us," I yelled at him. My breathing was a bit ragged but I managed to rap out my words all right. For a minute, I kept calling him out on how stupid he was. "A-And anyway! You have to calm down, all right?!"
After a pause, my friend\'s face stared dumbly at me. "Huh?"
Meeting his eyes with mine, I also stared at him dumbly. "Huh? I— I mean… Calm yourself down. Get it, you stupid moron?" His dumb facade crumbled only then, as he genuinely seemed shocked at me for what I\'d just said. With a look of pity on his face, he explained that no matter how you looked at it, I was the one who needed to calm the heck down. He was probably right, but the look of blatant pity he threw at me… He was right.
"Aren\'t you the one panicking, though, cute Haru? Hmmm? You be mama\'s big boy, now, and you stop panicking yourself! Heh! …Dare you tell me, the boss, to calm down now! Look— We\'ve been transported to another world… but thankfully: Ta-dah~" From behind his back, he produced a bowl of the udon we just ordered. "I still got it! My udon! It seems whatever you touched gets isekai\'d here with you, eh? Well anyway! To cheer you up, I\'ll share some with you! You must be mad, right? That\'s only \'cause your stomach\'s empty, I tell you!"
Suddenly, some sort of divine revelation struck me: I was so happy and glad to have such a bright friend... but that was if sarcasm wasn\'t already a thing, of course. "O-Oh… Yes… Absolutely, Kimon. What a great idea! I still have my chopsticks, so I can dig in just all right, correct?" I faked a beaming smile, gently parted my chopsticks with blissful cheerfulness, walked up to my friend, and whacked his head really hard. "—Like I\'d ever say that, you stupid moron!"
"Ow, ow, ow…! Y-You! Haruto! You tricked me!"
"I warned you, didn\'t I? You stupid moron."
"W-Warned me about…!"
"I don\'t care anymore: Mr. Kimon, I\'m afraid I\'ll have to act like I don\'t know you—"
"A-Aaah! Everything but this, Mr. Haruto! P-Please, don\'t abandon me! Y-Y-You can\'t... You have to take… responsibility!" Kimon theatrically placed his precious udon bowl down, teared up, and sprang to my knees. "P-Please…!"
"W-What\'re you on about, now!? You don\'t make sense! Creeping me out! I\'m afraid you got the wrong person, by the way, sir… I said \'lay off\'!" Kicking my friend off, I realized I was being a moron myself, now.
First off, Kimon was right, I was the one panicking the most, probably. Even if it was for a good reason, losing my cool wasn\'t the solution. Secondly, playing along with this fool\'s comedy, at a time like this, was indeed moronic of me.
But whatever, I now renewed my determination to see through this \'prank\'. Thankfully, for a little while, Kimon would keep his mouth shut and return to his treasured udon, murmuring to it that he\'d probably never get to taste it again, due to his situation as an Otherworlder… So I could concentrate.
Even ignoring him, we were in a serious situation, it seemed to me. Nothing to simply scoff at and half-heartedly dismiss. It wasn\'t a prank like any. Did that girl… who, at first glance is in her twenties, really is… the princess she said she is? Why was she talking from the other side of that doom-like sort of barrier anyway, we could barely hear her.
And what was it she said we\'d been summoned in? Roerdenville? The Castle? King\'s Hall? Too many questions flooded my mind, but I held it just fine. I wasn\'t to panic. It was fairly simple: to breathe in deep, ever so slowly, and to breathe all the air out, in the same fashion.