BXBX NOVEL Chapter 213 - Loving & Losing
Ye Jie had seen the news early in the morning reporting everything about Xu Liqing’s scandal. He thought that Xu Mey would call now. But she didn’t. He felt disappointed but didn’t lose hope.
Several times he picked up his phone to dial her number but each time, his thumb would hover over the name, ’My Baby’ before he’d lock the phone and throw it aside.
At first, he was fuming with rage and slowly that rage turned into bitterness than to sadness and eventually he felt empty. The reason he couldn’t call her was just to see whether she would call or not.
Oddly enough, in their marriage period the number of times she called him could be counted on one hand and still you’d have fingers to spare. His feeling of melancholy brought him to the bar in the evening.
He sat down at the stool and called out to the bartender, "One Negroni!"
The bartender took his order and brought the sun-kissed and refreshing drink. Ye Jie took a mouthful of the bittersweet, carmine-colored cocktail. The refreshing drink brought a distant voice to echo in his mind, "Hakuna Ma’Vodka!(*)"
A sad smile lingered at his lips at the reminder of Ru’s slogan. "Ya! (**)" He had knocked on her head saying, "Alcohol won’t solve your problems. It’ll just give you a momentary relaxation."
"My dear friend," Ru placed her arm over his shoulder saying, "Who said my problems will be gone with the alcohol? But haven’t you heard? Even milk won’t be able to solve my problems." She stared right into his eyes and winked wickedly saying, "Besides, ’Vodka might not be the answer, but it’s still worth a shot!’." She laughed at her own statement as Ye Jie glared at her. He was always annoyed at the way she related everything with proverbs.
But he knew, only she could do it.
"No-one can make better drinks than you..." Ye Jie whispered as he stared right at the drink in his glass. Suddenly, he lost interest.
He was already sad because of Xu Mey and now, nostalgia hit him hard in the guts.
He jolted a bit when someone tapped his shoulder lightly. Ye Jie turned and came face-to-face with a smiling face that looked like a spitting image of his own face. "I thought I saw you," Zhu Chen remarked taking a seat beside Ye Jie. While Ye Jie was staring dumbfoundedly at him, Zhu Chen gave his order to the bartender, "One old-fashioned cocktail!"
"What are you doing here?" Ye Jie questioned blankly and realized that his words must have sounded a bit rude. So, he added, "I mean to say that what brought you to Imperial?"
"Well... I’ve been stuck here from 2 weeks because of work." Zhu Chen answered as the bartender placed his drink before him. "What about you?" He turned to Ye Jie.
"I came yesterday." Ye Jie didn’t explain anything and Zhu Chen asked in detail either.
Zhu Chen saw the way Ye Jie was tracing his finger on the glass rim. "Are you upset?" Even Zhu Chen himself couldn’t figure out the reason why he asked this question. He just knew that seeing Ye Jie with that empty and blank gaze, his heart felt weird.
Ye Jie turned his face to look at Zhu Chen’s anxious face and was taken aback. ’Was this what they call fatherly concern?’ He asked himself and had to shook his head to get his mind and thoughts straight. "Is it very easy to forget someone when they’re not around?" Ye Jie couldn’t stop the words from leaving his mouth.
"Did you have a fight with Xiao Mey?" Zhu Chen thought perhaps that was the reason for Ye Jie’s sullen look.
Ye Jie scoffed. "Two people have to talk before they can fight."
Zhu Chen understood his meaning and smiled to himself. ’Young love... Quite impatient, huh!’
"Do you know what comes with love?" Zhu Chen questioned Ye Jie.
Ye Jie shook his head. "Fear!" Ye Jie furrowed his brows at this reply. Zhu Chen went on, "Fear of losing..."
Ye Jie got the gist of his reply at some level but Zhu Chen added after a pause, "Wherever love is involved, fear will follow it. And it’s only natural that when you love someone, you’re scared of losing them." He took a sip of his cocktail before continuing, "In reality, that fear pushes us to love even deeper. We try everything we possibly can just so that the person we love stays ours. Sometimes, this fear takes the form of obsession and then we want to chain that person with ourselves."
He looked straight into Ye Jie’s eyes that seemed to him like looking into a mirror. "But love is all about freedom." He suddenly laughed at a thought saying, "Do you know that my wife loves to talk? Like a lot... Oh, wait! Did I mention, a lot like a lot more than a lot?"
Ye Jie smiled at him as he listened attentively. Zhu Chen sighed, "But even though she loves to talk, she always forgets to tell me that she loves me. It’s really frustrating and I believe that’s exactly your problem as well, right?"
"Well, she remembers everyone but she seems to forget me easily." Ye Jie spoke bitterly.
Zhu Chen patted Ye Jie’s shoulder saying, "Oh, son!" Ye Jie’s body stiffened at the word, ’son’. It felt so natural but unfamiliar and yet it made him feel warm. Zhu Chen didn’t notice the changes in Ye Jie’s expressions as he continued, "Of course, she remembers you. And even if she doesn’t then as a husband, it’s our own job to remind them."
Ye Jie spent hours talking to Zhu Chen in the bar. It was fate or coincidence, he didn’t know. But he knew one thing that when he was feeling lonely, his biological father came up to him to cheer him up. And that feeling was really precious to Ye Jie.
He already knew that he was afraid of losing Xu Mey. It took him years to find her again, how could he have the heart to lose her again? But he was also afraid to ask her whether she was as much scared of losing him as he was? He believed that he might not be able to live if she said that she wasn’t scared like him.
’I guess Ru was right when she said that if I’m the one loving the most then I’d be the one losing the most as well. Gosh! I hate you, Ru!’ Obviously, he didn’t mean it. He just hated the fact that Ru was always right.
(*): "Hakuna Ma’Vodka": It means no memories for the rest of your night.
(**): "Ya!": Hey! in Korean (informal way) can be a bit offensive for some people.