I Want to Slack Off at the Demon Bureau

Chapter 57

"No, the food is delicious," Chu Zhishui retorted. "Bamboo Palace is so expensive, it would be strange if I didn't eat. Stop trying to trick me into cooking at every opportunity."

"Hmph."

Xin Yunmao had been eyeing the kitchen lately, but hadn't found a chance to go in. With the new refrigerator just delivered and no ingredients in the house, he hadn't had the opportunity to experiment with cooking.

Chu Zhishui wouldn't let him into the kitchen. It seemed too strange for a plant spirit to cook - what if he burned himself?

Xin Yunmao glanced at her from the corner of his eye, noticing her distracted eating. He grew increasingly puzzled: "You're also very quiet today."

"One shouldn't speak while eating or lying down," Chu Zhishui replied. "Isn't the Divine Lord always following the ways of the ancients?"

Xin Yunmao felt lectured about etiquette, emanating resentment as if his face clearly said "it's too much that you won't even chat with me."

Chu Zhishui lowered her head guiltily, avoiding his cool gaze. Usually, she was in the mood for casual conversation, but having just received such shocking information, she was still wrestling with questions about plant spirits' reproduction. More troublesome was that this was precisely the topic she couldn't discuss with him.

It wasn't that she didn't want to talk to him; it was just that the topics she wanted to discuss might seem improper to him.

After dinner, the human and spirit cleaned up their meal boxes and returned to their respective seats. Chu Zhishui sat at her computer, finally having the chance to search for answers online. However, just as she opened the web browser, she remembered Xin Yunmao was sitting behind her and might accidentally glimpse her screen.

If he caught her searching "how do bamboo reproduce," she might as well bid farewell to the Huaijiang Observation Bureau - it would become an indelible embarrassing memory in her life.

Chu Zhishui quickly opened some random web pages and furtively pulled out her phone. She pretended to look at the computer while actually viewing her phone screen, like a student secretly checking their phone with the discipline teacher sitting behind them.

Hong Ximing had said most plants were hermaphroditic, but Chu Zhishui wasn't sure if this applied to bamboo.

The all-knowing internet quickly provided results: bamboo had two methods of reproduction. One was asexual reproduction through underground rhizomes, just as she remembered. The other was sexual reproduction through flowering and seeding - the fruits called bamboo rice would fall to the ground and grow into new shoots.

Chu Zhishui was even more shocked after reading this - he actually had both pistils and stamens!

Even though spirits' human forms were identical to normal humans without any extra parts, the fact that Xin Yunmao had pistils still greatly surprised her.

She quickly scanned through the rest of the information, which described bamboo flowering cycles and what happens to different types of bamboo after flowering. Some bamboo die after flowering, while others survive - it varies depending on the species.

Chu Zhishui wasn't worried after reading this. Xin Yunmao had claimed to be a high-end variety and said that god-slaying was very difficult, so he surely wouldn't die from flowering.

When the Awakening of Insects arrived, spring thunder rolled.

The temperature in Huaijiang City gradually rose, with several light drizzles falling intermittently, coaxing out the tender buds of plants that had hibernated through winter - it was the perfect season for all things to awaken.

The Bureau's direct store hadn't officially opened yet, but New Transparency had already formed a new team, including many former Dragon Knowledge Video staff. Chu Zhishui had recently received a huge headhunting fee and happily dove into furniture shopping, gradually decorating her new home.

Xin Yunmao often came to help, but Chu Zhishui hadn't called him much lately, mainly because the courtyard wasn't ready yet.

When they first got the house, the neighborhood was barren, with only the riverside bamboo grove remaining evergreen through the seasons.

Spring rain was as precious as oil, falling like gossamer mist over the world, dyeing the ground with spots of green that rustled and merged together. The lawn that had been bare just two weeks ago was now covered in tender shoots and boundless spring scenery.

The only flaw was that her yard remained bare. The flowers and grass she had planted had sprouted, but the bamboo area showed no response, even though the spirit had reserved the most space for bamboo.

After getting everything ready, Chu Zhishui checked around and finally called out: "Xin Yunmao."

Moments later, a black rift tore through space, and Xin Yunmao stepped out from an empty corner, wearing a loose white long-sleeved shirt decorated with green patterns, looking casual yet elegant. Before he fully entered the yard, his complaints arrived first: "So you do remember to call me, after two weeks of not..."

His voice suddenly stopped as he saw the newly decorated courtyard, momentarily stunned.

The familiar rattan rocking chair, classical wooden table, and gleaming wooden rack - the rocking chair adorned with new cushions, the small table's upper level holding matcha cake and fresh fruit, the lower level holding green tea sets. Several pieces of furniture filled the small space, instantly transforming the yard.

They had recently cleaned out the yard together, and now everything was orderly, giving off an classical elegance after the furniture was placed.

"Happy birthday," Chu Zhishui clapped happily. "How is it? I set up your temple as promised."

Today was the first day after the Awakening of Insects, so she had recently made time to build the temple they had agreed upon.

Xin Yunmao had forgotten his own birthday. He walked forward in surprise, looking at the birthday celebration corner, and asked, "When did you buy all this? I've never seen these before."

"I bought them recently. Fortunately, the delivery was quick - I was worried they wouldn't arrive today."

So that's why she hadn't called him lately - she had gone to the furniture mall by herself.

Xin Yunmao lowered his gaze, having wondered why she hadn't called him for two weeks and feeling gloomy these past few days, not knowing she had been preparing this.

The sunlit courtyard, a classical minimalist corner, right next to her residence - it was the temple she had promised. After a thousand years, he actually had a place to call his own, truly a wonderful and novel experience.

Suddenly, spring thunder struck his heart, awakening the melancholy that had slumbered through winter, causing gentle waters of melting ice to surge in his chest.

Xin Yunmao noticed a wooden rack beside the small table, quite eye-catching, and asked: "What's this?"

"It's for umbrellas, and you can store other items too," Chu Zhishui introduced each item. "Then there's the cake, I chose matcha flavor with less cream, paired with fresh fruit and hot tea. Since you don't eat much, we'll celebrate with desserts and fruit."

"No, these should be offerings, celebrating the establishment of the Bamboo God Temple," she clapped happily with small movements, like an adorable seal. "Congratulations, Divine Lord, on the successful establishment of your temple."

Xin Yunmao's eyes flickered, and he suddenly felt shy, softly responding: "Mm."

"Come on, let you cut the cake. Do you want candles?" Chu Zhishui stuck a candle in the cake, then suddenly remembered something and hesitated, "But I don't think we have a lighter at home, should we go to the stove..."

Xin Yunmao calmly said: "No need."

The next second, the candle lit up with the wind, blooming into a bright flame, flickering atop the matcha cake.

Chu Zhishui exclaimed: "How convenient!"

Two round stools were placed beside the small table, perfect for them to sit and dine. On this sunny afternoon, the human and spirit enjoyed dessert outdoors, finally having time to appreciate the spring scenery.

Xin Yunmao cut the first piece of cake, carefully placing it on a plate and holding it out to Chu Zhishui.

"Aren't you going to eat the first piece yourself?" Chu Zhishui hesitantly accepted. "It is an offering for your temple, after all."

Xin Yunmao shook his head: "Since they're my offerings, I get to decide how to distribute them."

"Fair enough."

Chu Zhishui took her first bite, experiencing the rich matcha sweetness, paired with a slightly bitter hot tea - an indescribably wonderful taste.

Xin Yunmao watched her eyes crinkle with pleasure, his usually cool face softening as he finally cut a piece for himself, joining her at the wooden table. As he took a bite, the soft, delicate texture spread waves of sweetness through his mouth, light and lingering, not cloying at all.

A gentle breeze blew, sunlight everywhere - it was a peaceful afternoon tea.

After a while, Xin Yunmao pointed to the rocking chair area and confirmed: "You said this is my temple, so this belongs to me too?"

"Yes."

He nodded with satisfaction and casually leaned back in the rattan rocking chair. His clothes changed in the blink of an eye. With ink-black hair flowing loose and cyan-white ancient robes adorned with black flames dancing at the sleeves, he instantly transformed into his classical attire, lounging lazily in the rocking chair.

Chu Zhishui had seen him in traditional clothing before, but never so casually dressed. In the past, he at least had his hair tied up with a crown, but now it just hung loose, with even his collar hanging slack, revealing his collarbones and a small patch of skin that gleamed with a frost-like luster.

His dark eyelashes drooped, seemingly touched by drowsiness, making him look like a leisurely immortal in exile.

While Xin Yunmao usually appeared dignified and elegant in traditional dress when he removed his concealment spell, now as he lazily rocked in the chair, he exuded an air of casual nonchalance. With his clothes worn so carelessly and his outstanding features, he appeared languid and alluring, no longer cold and distant.

Chu Zhishui held her cake fork, staring in surprise: "Are you at your own home? You're completely ignoring your appearance."

"The temple is like home," Xin Yunmao turned to look at her, "Didn't you know?"

"?"

Chu Zhishui quipped: "I don't see any gods or Buddhas in the temple being so disheveled. Weren't you the one who used to complain about being looked at?"

He replied carelessly: "Haven't you seen the Maitreya Buddha?"

It was clear he had truly relaxed; now he was saying whatever came to mind, and if left unchecked, he might really get out of hand.

"Maitreya Buddha wears even less than you. Are you planning to follow his example?" Chu Zhishui responded expressionlessly to his repeated retorts, then urged, "Well, go ahead then, keep undressing."

"..."

Sure enough, Xin Yunmao, who had been nonchalant moments ago, sat up startled upon hearing this. His ears burning red, he turned to glare at her while hastily fixing his clothes. He seemed to want to rebuke her for her audacity, but in the end, he only pressed his lips together, saying nothing.

From his ears to the exposed skin at his collar, a pink flush spread, completely betraying his inner agitation and unease. Clearly, her words had left him stunned.

Chu Zhishui had recently noticed him becoming increasingly informal, but this old-fashioned bamboo spirit obviously still had some principles: he would completely lose his composure when faced with modern playful teasing.

Aliali: 674546a8c4f3f33ac44c92acThese past few days, she had been walking on eggshells around him because of the stamen and pistil incident, but seeing him now flustered with embarrassment suddenly made her relax. She deliberately teased: "Let me braid your hair."

His black hair was of excellent quality, perfect for braiding.

"No." Xin Yunmao flatly refused, gathering up all his hair and even putting on his jade crown, afraid she might actually try.

Now he had returned to his proper, dignified divine lord appearance, no longer daring to show any casual demeanor, fearing his devotees might treat him like a doll to play with.

Finding his reaction amusing, Chu Zhishui continued to tease him: "I've just finished my cake and have nothing else to do. Let's play around a bit."

Hearing this, Xin Yunmao furrowed his brows, seemingly embarrassed and shocked: "When you're free, you want to play with my body!?"

Now that she was well-fed, why was she acting like a spoiled noble, thinking up ways to torment a spirit?

Chu Zhishui choked on her words, her face instantly heating up: "I meant playing with your hair, not your body. Don't twist my words!"

"What's the difference?" he gazed at her with deep eyes, saying softly, "Either. Way. You're. Playing. With. Me."

"..."