After Transmigration, Her Whole Family Are Villains

"Don\'t take it out on the child. Your situation is still good - she just can\'t understand poetry. My daughter is even worse. Trying to get her to read is like pulling teeth. All day long, she just learns how to apply makeup. Can good looks put food on the table?"

Commander Jiang tidied his hair. Though disheveled, he was still handsome.

Looking at him could whet one\'s appetite.

Sometimes, good looks could indeed put food on the table.

He sighed, "I\'m not beating her because she doesn\'t understand. She understands everything. She just refuses to study properly, deliberately provoking me. You don\'t know - those three-piece bath sets, the toilet, the slippers, pajamas, cotton robes, all sorts of things - they\'re all her inventions. Her brain works better than my father\'s and mine combined. When it comes to creating things that make life comfortable, her imagination knows no bounds. Take bathing, for instance. She came up with a shower head that makes water spray out of the copper fixture like flower petals, just so she could take a hot shower without having to do it manually."

Inspector He: ...

So it turns out I\'m the only one actually scolding my child, while you\'re here bragging about yours.

Is this really necessary in the middle of the night?

"Where can I find that shower head? Even the Inspector\'s Suite doesn\'t have one," Inspector He couldn\'t help but comment.

"It\'s not finished yet. It\'s a bit complicated. We\'ve only made two at home so far. If you\'re interested, Brother He, you can try it tomorrow."

"By the way, Brother Jiang, you shouldn\'t use a stick to beat her. It\'s easy to cause injury. You should use bamboo twigs, the thin, dense kind. When they hit the skin, the pain spreads over a wider area, but it\'s less likely to cause harm," Inspector He suggested sincerely, rubbing his own leg.

Jiang Changtian smiled sheepishly. Although he had a stick, he never actually hit her. His daughter was so adorable, how could he bear to strike her? When he got angry, at most he\'d pull his own hair. He wouldn\'t hit his daughter. Tonight was just a coincidence.

"I\'m sorry, I\'m sorry, Brother He. The tea tonight is excellent. It\'s also my Mianmian\'s creation. She selected hundreds of tea trees and finally chose one. She personally planted and cared for it, picking the leaves on specific days each year. The taste is sweet and refreshing. We get less than a jin (500 grams) a year. Tonight, I was only able to get some from her because you took a beating for her. Consider it a benefit of your misfortune. You must try it properly."

Inspector He: ...

Bah!

In the capital, everyone was into kung fu tea, and Inspector He knew how to brew it too.

But here in Jingzhou, there were a few extra items.

There was also a tea scoop, a fair cup, a tea strainer, and a tea pick.

And a small scale for weighing.

Watching Jiang Changtian meticulously weigh out only five qian (25 grams) of tea leaves, Inspector He found him increasingly irritating.

What a waste of a handsome face, he thought. Just looking at him was annoying.

Jiang Changtian unhurriedly weighed and brewed the tea.

He wasn\'t lying; this tea was truly exceptional.

He rarely brewed it for others.

He only brought it out because he felt Inspector He was useful, definitely very useful and valuable.

Jiang Changtian was not one for pointless socializing.

If he was friendly to outsiders, it was certainly because they were useful. Otherwise, he preferred to spend time with his family, even if it meant having his little girl anger him to the point of pulling his own hair.

A small charcoal fire burned, spring water boiled, steeping the curled tea leaves. They watched as the leaves unfurled and the water turned a pale green, releasing a fragrant aroma.

"Many people discard the first brew, but this tea is so precious and rare that I never pour it out. It can be drunk directly."

Jiang Changtian used small tongs to pick up a tiny cup, not even a full mouthful, just half a sip of tea, and placed it in front of Inspector He.

Inspector He was at a loss for words. Such a small cup - was it out of preciousness or because it tasted good? The guest had waited so long, and before they could even wet their teeth, it was gone.

Never mind, he thought. He had inexplicably taken a beating earlier.

The current emperor might dislike him, but even he had never beaten him.

Thinking about it, he felt shortchanged. But the tea did smell wonderful.

Inspector He picked up the hot little cup and drank it in one gulp. He felt a warm current flow down his throat, as if his entire body\'s pores had opened up. Suddenly, he felt invigorated.

Inspector He\'s eyes widened. Was this normal for good tea?

If so, what had they been drinking before?

He eagerly awaited the next cup, watching as Jiang Changtian rinsed the cup with water. Hurry up and pour...

He didn\'t mind drinking from the same cup, no need to rinse.

Watching Jiang Changtian carefully use the tongs to bring over another half cup, he grew impatient.

He longed to pour himself a large cup and drink it all at once.

It was elegant, yes, but it truly tested one\'s patience.

As another cup went down his throat, he finally felt like he had rinsed all his teeth.

The fragrance lingered in his mouth.

A true lingering fragrance.

Inspector He thought again of the thousand-tael-per-night Inspector\'s Suite and commented, "This tea is excellent, even better than the tea in the Inspector\'s Suite."

Jiang Changtian smiled and said, "Of course. The tea in the Inspector\'s Suite, although picked from high mountains and mists, can be bought with money. The tea at home is personally grown by my daughter. It can\'t be bought with money."

Inspector He: ... I don\'t have money.

After that, he drank the tea earnestly.

Watching Jiang Changtian brew the tea with such care, well, being able to drink a cup of tea personally brewed by someone with Commander Jiang\'s looks was indeed something money couldn\'t buy.

These mere five qian of tea became more flavorful with each sip.

There was even a feeling of intoxication.

He broke out in a light sweat from head to toe.

There was even a slight tipsiness.

It was simply magical.

In all his years, he had never tasted such delicious tea.

Inspector He felt that Jiang Changtian was right about one thing: his daughter truly knew how to enjoy life. She had a gift for improving the quality of life in every aspect.

After drinking too much tea, he became tipsy and drunk.

When Inspector He woke up the next day, he was bewildered to see Jiang\'s little girl in front of him, ready to formally become his disciple.

He saw Jiang Changtian wearing a white robe, looking fresh and spirited.

Inspector He frowned and asked, "Aren\'t you going to the office today?"

Jiang Changtian smiled and said, "Today is a rest day. At the Jingzhou Government Office, we work five days and rest for two. It\'s extremely humane. We need to work for the people, but also for our families. Family members are citizens too."

Jiang Mianmian looked innocent. Who could have known that she\'d wake up with a new teacher?

She just couldn\'t believe that after all her antics, her father still hadn\'t given up.

She really didn\'t want to be some female prodigy or outstanding young woman. She had enough of that competitive life in her previous life. In this life, she just wanted to take it easy, as easy as possible.

Looking at the incredibly smart Uncle He before her, Jiang Mianmian put on a sweet smile and presented him with a package of tea leaves.

This was truly excellent tea. She had dripped a drop of spirit spring water on it, but later found many ants and animals crawling towards it, so she didn\'t dare mess with it anymore.

Inspector He had initially wanted to back out, but when he saw the package of tea leaves.

He couldn\'t resist and accepted it.

By accepting the tea leaves, he also accepted a student.

Actually, when it came to teaching students, he did have experience.

After all, the He family had produced several top scholars and court examiners.

He didn\'t believe he couldn\'t handle a child.

A young girl in her early teens should be a piece of cake.

However, remembering what Jiang Changtian had said last night about the translation of "Time flows like this," he became a bit more cautious.

He said, "I\'m very strict when it comes to accepting students. I\'ll give you a test. If you can pass it, then we can talk about you becoming my disciple."

Jiang Mianmian nodded obediently.

Inspector He thought that since Jiang Changtian had asked about the Analects yesterday, the little girl must have studied it. So he decided to focus on the Analects, asking her to write out translations.

As long as they were close enough, he would accept the package of tea leaves.

The questions Inspector He chose were quite simple, without any obscure ones.

He was deliberately going easy on her.

Jiang Mianmian looked at the questions, trying hard to recall the contents of the "Analects." She didn\'t want to study with Uncle He; Uncle He\'s hair looked so thin.

Inspector He had breakfast at the Jiang family home.

The breakfast was delicious, the noodles had great texture, and he loved it.

He enjoyed noodles.

After finishing, he wiped his oily mouth and went to check his student\'s work.

Jiang Changtian even personally accompanied him.

Inspector He thought, it\'s fine, don\'t worry, I won\'t hit your child.

He pushed open the door to the study and entered. He saw a girl sitting with a straight back, writing conscientiously. Her brush-holding posture was also very nice, each stroke careful and deliberate. She looked extremely well-behaved.

Inspector He thought to himself, Jiang Changtian just spoils his child too much. The child might run wild in front of him, but there wouldn\'t be such problems with me.

Look, isn\'t she doing well, being so obedient?

The translation he asked for was also completed.

Inspector He gently picked it up to read:

"The Master does not speak of prodigies, feats of strength, disorders, or spiritual beings.

Translation: Confucius doesn\'t need to say a word; with his strange power, he beats people until they become mentally disordered.

In the morning, hear the Way; in the evening, die content.

Translation: If you hear the way to your house in the morning, by evening you\'ll be dead."

Since you\'ve come, then rest here.

Translation: Since you\'ve arrived, let\'s bury you here.

The departed are like my husband, not leaving day or night.

Translation: The dead person is just like my husband, resembling him both day and night.

What Boya thinks of, Zhong Ziqi must obtain.

Translation: Boya thinks he must obtain Zhong Ziqi.

...(Note 1)

Inspector He\'s cheeks twitched back and forth as he painfully pulled out the package of tea leaves from his body and returned it to Jiang Er: "I can\'t teach, I really can\'t teach. I admit defeat. Here\'s your tea back."

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(Note 1: Humorous translations sourced from internet jokes.)