Chaos Effect

Chapter 76: Chapter 76

'And now I have to deal with needless delays,' he thought to himself as he glowered at the five people seated before him.

"Mr. Kaiba, if we want to present the best duels to the world we need to give the duelists time to rest," Fillion said with a sigh; Seto sort of got the man's frustrations, as this was an old argument ever since Seto had begun planning his tournament. Of course for Seto it was frustrating because the man kept demanding that he do foolish things like have breaks and give duelists time to prepare.

'If they aren't ready to duel at a moment's notice then they don't deserve to be in my tournament,' he thought to himself before saying aloud, "Isn't that what sleep is for? I gave them the entire night... why do they need more hours to do nothing?"

"They need to eat, Mr. Kaiba," Ms. Brennan stated, shooting him a hard look. "They aren't machines."

"Neither am I yet I don't need to take time away from dueling. I snuck a bite in during one of the duels, why can't the rest of them do that?"

"Because most people aren't like you, Mr. Kaiba," Mr. Fillion said, the baldly man taking out a handkerchief and dabbing at his scalp.

"Believe me, I know that," Seto said darkly. Sometimes he thought the world would be a far better place if more people were like him, understanding just how foolish they were and how much time they wasted on trivial things. "But even in that case these delays are just prolonging things. Why keep dragging this part of the tournament along, especially when none of the rest of the duels matter."

Mr. Robinson frowned. "Sir, I think the rest of the finalists would disagree on that. We haven't even had half our matches yet."

"And they don't matter," Seto said firmly. "Joey Wheeler? Rex Raptor? None of them are going to get much farther in Battle City. They were always here to just to fill up the bracket, to make so it wasn't just a single duel that decided things. But we all know that in the end Battle City will come down to me and Yugi Muto. We have been dancing about each other ever since I found out that his grandfather had the 4th copy of the Blue Eyes White Dragon. This tournament is about the two of us. Nothing else."

Ms. Billings sighed at that, looking down at the folder she was holding. "Sir, of the remaining duelists we have one who is in the Top Three along with you and Mr. Muto-"

"Edwin Chaos is nothing more than a jabbering loon. He only got into Battle City through dumb luck. He is not a concern for me... he honestly will never be a concern for me."

She continued on as if he hadn't said a word. "We have the American Champion Brom Bones-"

"American," Seto scoffed. "They barely know how to duel. The only reason people care about them is because Pegasus' family is from America and even then he spent most of his life in European and Japan." He glared at the officials, daring them to try and defend the giant mask-wearing fooling. Admittedly Brom had pretty much kept to himself, which was better than most of the duelists he was being forced to deal with but that didn't change his mind that the man wasn't going to matter much in the grand scheme of things. "Who do you want me to worry about next? Mai Valentine chipping a nail?"

"And Miss Ishtar?" Ms. Brennan asked. "I believe that she helped in setting up this tournament."

"She merely suggested I put it on, nothing else." He wasn't about to admit, even to them, that Ishizu had gotten the Egyptian government to donate some of the funds needed to set up Battle City, as well as used their clout on the international political scene to get Domino City to grant him the permits he needed. He would have been able to do all that himself, after all... it would have just taken more time.

"Mr. Kaiba," the final official, Mr. Ashton, said with a voice full of iron, "the rules of this tournament were set up and finalized before you even made your announcement. I know you are frustrated because you've built this up in your head as some grand redemption tour for yourself after your loss to Yugi Muto-"

"Excuse me?" Seto said, slowly standing up, looming over his desk.

"-but that is NOT what this tournament is about. Battle City is about three things, Mr. Kaiba. First and foremost it is showing the new partnership between KaibaCorp, Industrial Illusions, and Chaos Communications."

Seto grit his teeth at that. "I am only working with Pegasus because I was forced to. As for Chaos Communications there is NO partnership with them!"

"I disagree," Mr. Aston stated. "Edwin Chaos has a minority interest in KaibaCorp and Industrial Illusions. For all the technical terminology that he is 'The Sole Member of the Board of Directors' it is more accurate to state he is a partial owner. He is also the eldest nephew of Kipling Chaos and according to court documents is listed as heir to half of his corporate empire, with the other half going to his brother. CCN will belong to Edwin Chaos and it is important that we develop a relationship with them... and him.

"Now then, Battle City may be viewed by you and the finalists as just another tournament-" Seto muttered under his breath that it was not merely 'another tournament', "-but it is a chance to show off both Duel Monsters and your new Duel Disc system. The game has exploded in popularity over the last year but this tournament is its chance to become one of the most dominate games in the world. But how are children expected to fall in love with Duel Monsters if they see one of the most skilled players decide to alter the rules of a tournament JUST because he doesn't have any patience?"

Seto glared at them... because he knew they were right.

"Fine," he said. "But we keep right on schedule. No added delays."

"That we can agree on," Mr. Fillion stated. "CCN alone will be very upset if they can't keep the coverage on schedule."

"Then maybe Edwin and the rest of his family are actually worth something..." Seto muttered as the five officials stood up and left his office. 'It doesn't matter though. Even if I have to wait a month for the next round I know that we are racing towards a true course correction. Ever since I learned of that 4th Blue-Eyes White Dragon things have not gone my way.' His mind flashed to his duel against Solomon Muto. 'I betrayed my own ethical code in my desperate need to obtain that card... and then destroyed it without thought because I allowed my fears to get the best of me. And then there was Yugi... he managed to defeat he, giving me my first true loss. One I haven't been able to truly correct...' The duel against him at Pegasus' castle would never truly count... it was a tainted victory. 'But now... now I will make things right. I will defeat Yugi. I will claim Slifer the Sky Dragon and The Winged Dragon of Ra. And when I do all will be right in the world... with me at the very top of it, looking down!'

~MC~MC~MC~

Mai frowned as she walked into the dining room area only to find Yugi and his friends gathered around a table, a mix of food and Duel Monster cards covering the table. Edwin, Yuri, and Renard were seated at another table, watching everything yet clearly also wishing they weren't. It reminded Mai of one time in her youth when she had worked at a country club as a caddy, playing up her "I'm sweet and cute" vibe before her curves had come in and she'd switched to "I'll ruin your marriage and you'll thank me for it" persona. During the fall, when it got too cold for the guys to golf, the club would have shooting competitions. She hadn't helped with that but one day had come to grab some stuff from her locker only to find one heavy set blowhard claiming he was going to win while wielding a shotgun so comically big Elmer Fudd would have scoffed. The old fellows at one table had watched on as the man had set about trying to fire the damn thing, watching with a mix of interest in what would happen... and dread for what may happen.

Her boyfriend and close friends had the same exact looks.

"Do I even want to know?" she asked as she sat down, one of the waiting staff instantly coming up to her and giving her a menu. Edwin opened his mouth to say something only to quickly shut it so she could focus on picking out what she wanted to eat.

"See, and this card here sis, its real important," Joey said, pointing something on the table. "It's a dark type-"

"It's a light type, Joey. That's barbeque sauce," Tristan pointed out.

Mai settled on a chicken sandwich that looked to be filling enough to keep her from needing to constantly snack (always a danger at tournaments) while not being so heavy that it would make her sick just before she dueled. The waitress brought her a coke ('Thank you goddess whose powers let me avoid the Diet Coke!') and Mai sipped it before watching as Joey, Tristan, and Duke began to argue about different attributes while Koyo, Yugi, and Tea looked on. Serenity, for her part, just kept blinking her eyes, clearly trying to keep up.

And it slowly dawned on her just what was happening.

"Oh lord, they are trying to teach her Duel Monsters?"

"They are," Renard confirmed.

Yuri though frowned. "Wait, when you so "oh lord"... are you talking about yourself?"

Mai though was more focused on Serenity as Yugi finally chimed in, trying to explain just how to Syncro Summon, and she shut her eyes, trying to block out the sight of Joey's poor sister looking so utterly confused by everything they were throwing at her.

"On the plus side at least it isn't Dungeon Dice Monsters," Edwin stated.

"That's all well and good..." Duke said at that very moment, "but you know what is really great? When you lay down some dice-"

Mai promptly stood up and stormed over to the table, grabbing Serenity's arm. "Come."

"Hey!" Joey exclaimed as Mai pulled Serenity to her feet. "What ya think you're doin', Mai!? We're tryin' ta teach Serenity here how ta play Duel Monsters!"

"And I'm going to make sure she still wants to LEARN how to play Duel Monsters, Joey," Mai said with a huff, motioning for Joey to sit down. "You made it to the Duelist Kingdom finals and were trained by Mr. Muto and you still think that word salad you were trying to shove at her was going to help?" She turned and glared at the rest of them. "And the rest of you aren't any better! Rushing through the important stuff and not even covering the rest? If I don't step in your will have her asking to hit on summoning a Warrior-Type."

"Yugi said something about waiting for the river," Serenity said, the young teen's eyes going wide as he hastily waved his hands about, clearly not wanting to discuss that.

"Come on Serenity, I'm going to teach you the proper way to duel."

"I can handle it!" Joey exclaimed again only for Tea to place a hand on his shoulder as he moved to chase after his sister and Mai. "Hey, what are ya doin', Tea?!"

"Maybe Mai is the right person to teach her, Joey," Tea argued, though she did so in the kindest voice she could muster.

"What are ya talkin' about?" Joey complained, his accent thicker than normal; Mai had noticed that when he got really emotional he tended to slip further and further into his Brooklyn roots. "I can teach her just fine! She's my sister, after all!"

"And that might be the problem, Joey," Tea said. "Look... Yugi taught you to duel, right?"

"Yea!" Joey said proudly, puffing up even as he reached over and smacked Yugi so hard on the back the boy toppled to the ground. "And because of 'im I made it to the Duelist Kingdom Finals!"

"But was he as good of a teacher as Mr. Muto?"

Joey blinked at that. "Well... I mean...er... that is..."

Yugi smiled as he got back in his chair. "It's okay, Joey... grandpa is a great teacher."

The young man let out a sigh of relief, glad he didn't have to insult his best friend. "Yeah... I mean I'm always gonna be grateful ta Yug for teachin' me but gramps... he just made it all suddenly click. It was like... I knew that a door was locked and I knew to turn the handle but he showed me to trick to get it to open because it kept getting' stuck."

"Because sometimes people need to be taught a different way," Tea said. "And I think, with you being so close to Serenity, you aren't the right person to show her how to play Duel Monsters. I think Mai will be the better choice."

"Eh, I don't know..." Joey said and Mai could practically see the thought bubble appearing over his head...

"Hello Joseph," a Serenity who was dressed just like Mai said. "I can't stick around and chat... I just came here to emasculate you. Buh-bye!"

"Come on man, let her help out," Tristan said. "You need to focus on figuring out which of your decks you are going to use for your duel."

"Well..." he looked at Serenity. "Ya don't mind Mai helpin' ya, do ya sis?"

"Oh no!" Serenity said quickly, shaking her head before blushing and lowering her chin to her chest. "That is... if she doesn't mind helping me..."

"I wouldn't have offered if I wasn't willing to do so," Mai stated, loosening her grip on Serenity's arm now that the girl was actually following her. "Now then," she said as they settled at the table, the waitress bringing over Mai's food while Renard retrieved what remained of Serenity's lunch and placed it before her, "let's go over the basics, okay? Duel Monsters can be won three ways: the most common is to reduce your opponent's lifepoints from 4000 to 0. The next is to get them to run out of cards for them to draw from their deck. And finally some decks have win conditions where if you do something then you defeat your opponent."

"Like Yugi did to Kaiba," Serenity said, looking rather pleased that she knew that.

"That's right. So each duelist has their own deck and they are made up of three different types of cards: Monsters, Spells, and Traps."

"And there are lots of different versions of those," Serenity said though the way her voice raised at the end of that it was clear she was looking to confirm that she was right. When Mai nodded the young girl frowned. "There sure is a lot to remember."

"I'll help you out. By the time this tournament is done you'll be able to duel like the rest of us."

"That would be great! Joey makes it sound really fun." She looked at Mai. "Thanks for helping me... Edwin was right, you are the best person to help me."

Mai slowly looked over at her boyfriend, the pieces falling into place. One man who had a need to play white knight plus one girlfriend who didn't need a man to control her plus the perfect little project to distract her from the whole goddess thing...

"He was right... but only about that," Mai assured Serenity while Edwin flashed a weak smile before deciding that it was better to survive than to be brave, hurrying off as quick as he could.

~MC~MC~MC ~

"It has been a while, Maximillion."

Pegasus turned and smiled as he spotted the tall, darkly clothed giant of a man who was walking towards him. In one hand he held a pint glass filled with a frothy beer while in the other was a sandwich that, for anyone else, would have fed a family of four quite easily. The American duelist's hair was pulled back as it always was, and his beard was oiled too, which was normal for him.

"Brom," Pegasus said politely. "I see you are making yourself comfortable."

"I am," the man said with a smile, motioning for Pegasus to follow him to a window. It was rare for there to be someone in the world that could make Pegasus simply leap at their command but Brom Bones had always held a dichotomy of presence that made all stand up just a bit straighter when he came around. He was at once polite and respectful while being utterly intimidating. Pegasus had never seen him mad but he knew with the man's large size he could do quite a bit of damage if he wanted.

'And that doesn't take into account his brain,' Pegasus thought to himself. 'Someone that large you expect them to be a dimwitted bruiser. A slab of muscle that is pointed at a threat and told to deal with it. But Brom... Brom has cunning and knowledge in that thick skull of his. He isn't the witless weight lifter so many would want him to be in order for him to fit the stereotypes they'd already built up in their head.'

"You are thinking about me," Brom stated with a soft chuckle as the stood by the window, the large man leaning against the windowsill and staring out at the clouds about them. "Being rather loud about that."

"Are you able to read minds now rather than merely diagnosis them?" Pegasus teased.

Brom shook his head. "You have an expressive face. You might not realize it and to most of the world you probably appear to be rather in control of your thoughts and reactions... but to me they are clear as day."

"Hmmm," Pegasus said to himself. "I suppose I will need to work on that." He looked out the window, the only sounds around them being the soft hum of the blimp's engines and Brom taking a tearing bite out of his sandwich. "I never got a moment to apologize to you."

"Mmm?" Brom said, swallowing the mouthful of sandwich before taking a long pull on his pint glass. "And what exactly do you need to apologize about?"

"Duelist Kingdom," he stated. "Some of the Eliminators I hired... they saw it for what it really was. Others, like you, were told it was something else entirely and didn't learn the truth until you got there." He sighed, shaking his head as he thought of those dark days. "I said it was supposed to be a tournament to truly showcase my game and let the world see how wonderful it was. But in reality it was all a front for my delusions. To take control of KaibaCorp after stealing it right from under Kaiba's nose-" He felt a momentary flash of delight at that victory... while he knew it was wrong to have done so he still enjoyed the fact that he had managed to outsmart Kaiba-Boy so easily, "-and to try and do the unthinkable."

"There is no need to apologize," Brom stated with a casual shrug.

"But I want to because I lied to you."

"You did... but a lie loses much of its power when the other person knows it not to be true."

Pegasus glanced at the man, his shoulders slumping. "That obvious?"

"It was. To me at least. You stank of desperation and remorse. Death clung to you like a funeral shroud." Brom paused and, in a softer voice, said, "And death and I are old friends."

"Then why did you agree to become an Eliminator, if you know what I was doing? I know you Brom... you aren't someone who desires violence and causing pain in others. Quite the opposite."

Brom was much like Renard in that he was well known throughout the gaming world as a man of honor. He treated every loss as if it were a victory and every victory as a lose. He did not pout and throw tantrums when things didn't go his way nor did he celebrate with such glee that it came off as mockery. He never sought to overdo a victory either... there were plenty of duelists who would pile onto their opponents, trying to do as much harm as they could in order to make a better impression on those watching. Attacking with a more powerful monster when a weaker one would win the duel. Brom never did that. He showed respect to every duelist, no matter their skill. Pegasus knew that there were tournaments where he was the last to leave because he wanted to thank the janitors for taking the time to clean up any messes they had made.

"For you that must have been like drinking from a poisoned chalice."

Brom chuckled at that. "Which many people have happily done over the years. And I don't mean out of despair... some do it because they are curious. To dance that close to the end of life, to understand what it is like... it can be a siren's song."

"Is that why you did it then? Because you wanted to dance at the edge of darkness?"

"No," Brom admitted. "I wanted to see how close you would get." He took another bite of his sandwich, not saying a word until he was finished. "You had suffered a great tragedy, Maximillion. And that tragedy... it clung to you like spider web. It refused to release you and I think, in part, you didn't want to let it go."

"Didn't want..." Pegasus began to say.

"Indeed," Brom stated. "Because you felt that if you moved on from her death then you were moving on from her. By keeping yourself wrapped up in your grief you wouldn't ever truly be parted from her. You... felt you deserved to feel the pain of all that."

Pegasus started at the larger man in shock before shaking his head. "No... that's not-"

"Don't lie. Not to me and not to yourself." Brom didn't bother to glance at him but Pegasus could feel that the man had his sole attention on him. "When a life is loss, no matter how it happens... no matter if it was expected or not... it leaves a wound in the souls of all that knew them. Good and evil. It effects all around us. And just like a wound... it can alter how we live. A man wounded in the leg might begin to limp because of the pain hurts him so badly. Every step is agony. And that pain causes them to shift and alter things, which in turn cause other parts to hurt. Muscles they've never used before suddenly find themselves in demand. That alters other things. It alters how the man sits. How the man stands. And those changes cause more changes until they compound together... and change the man.

"The same happened to you, Maximillion. Cecelia's death changed you. Hurt you. And in turn that hurt caused more change and more change."

"And my changes... changed others," he admitted.

"Yes. We are all connected." Brom paused and, to Pegasus' surprise, he reached out and placed a hand on his shoulder. "We are all connected... so that one can help mend that wound."

"That's why you came to Duelist Kingdom?"

"It is," Brom said. "Luckily... there were others that helped you. Their methods were extreme at times. They weren't subtle. One's was... rather violent."

Pegasus reached up, touching the eye patch he wore over the gaping hole that was his lost eye.

"But they helped you. They were... surgeries to repair damage. To teach you how to how to walk as you once did. The pain is still there... but you can live through it. It doesn't control you anymore."

He softly nodded at that. "You are a good psychologist, Brom."

"I am," he said with a soft chuckle. "But... that isn't how I know all that." He pushed himself away from the window sill.

"What do you mean?" Pegasus asked, intrigued.

Brom merely stared at him. "And so I walk through the valley in the shadow of death? That is how it goes? Once there was no valley for me. Just a great chasm... filled with the dead. And the wails of those who cursed me for that."

And on that note... Brom walked away.

~MC~MC~MC~

"Hey Rex," I said as I walked over to the Dino Duelist, who was seated in the lounge area we had all first been ushered into when we'd come onto the blimp. He was next to a table, going over his cards, and shot me a dark look, causing me to quickly hold out my hands before I got any close. "Go ahead and put your deck away. I promise I won't peak."

"....hmmmpf. Suppose it doesn't matter... you've already seen my deck."

"Only part of it," I stated. "I know that there are a lot of Dino cards out there... and new ones come out every day. Even so its only polite... sorry, I should have let you know I was coming over."

That made Rex stare at me all the harder before he began to began to gather up his cards. "Sometimes I don't understand you, Chaos."

"Many people don't but what is it that has you so befuddled, Rex."

"There are times where you are the most arrogant ass in the world," he stated as he gathered up the last of his cards and put them into his deck box. I still waited until he waved me over to have a seat. "And then you do things like that... get real polite and stuff. Just doesn't seem to fit you."

"I think it fits him real well," Koyo said, surprising both me and Rex as we hadn't heard him sneak in. The teen smiled as he walked over, munching on a single serve bag of potato chips. "It's his mask."

"His mask?" Rex said, confused.

"Edwin has to portray himself a certain way in public... he's part of KaibaCorp and he's wealthy and he's dating Mai Valentine and he's friends with powerful duelists. People couldn't handle it if he were all kind and sweet. So he acts like a jerk in order to live up to who they expect him to be."

"Hmmm," I said before smirk. "Interesting. Wrong, but interesting."

Koyo raised an eyebrow at that. "Oh?"

I chuckled. "Let's ignore the fact that you are fishing and probably knew that theory was wrong..." the young man had the decency to smirk at me, letting me know I'd gotten that right, "...I'm a mirror."

"Huh?" Rex said, confused.

"What you come at me with is what I come at you with," I stated. "When I verbally sparred with you Rex you lipped off a bit but that was it. You weren't some jackass threatening those I care about, you weren't spouting racist garbage or being a vile bastard. You were just trash talking so I trash talked back. But notice I went after you rather mildly."

Rex pondered that for a moment. "Huh... yeah. I mean we traded a few comments but I know you've done a whole lot worse."

"Look at Weevil," I said.

"Do I have to?" Koyo asked.

I let out a barking laugh at that. "Oh, I like you kid! Now then, Weevil is a conniving little cheat. In Duelist Kingdom he threw Yugi's Exodia cards into the ocean." I paused. "So I threatened to throw him in to join them."

"Seriously?" Koyo asked.

Rex though laughed. "Seriously! Weevil made the mistake of whining about it when we all got kicked back onto the boat. Was trying to get Edwin booted from Duelist Kingdom. All it did though was make the rest of us see him as a giant boob!"

"The only time the words giant and boob were used in reference to Weevil," I said with a snicker before looking at Rex. "Yugi at Duelist Kingdom suddenly got a chip on his shoulder so I came right at him with both barrels. But I dueled a guy named Sheppard here in Battle City and he was nothing but respectful...so other than some light joking I was respectful to him." I decided not to mention the fact that Sheppard apparently was part of a group (I was still debating if it was a cult or not) that had been founded by my previous incarnation.

"That makes sense," Koyo stated.

"So, you know that this purely comes from a place of curiosity and nothing else... why are you hiding out, Rex?"

"Whaddaya mean?"

"You haven't come to watch anyone duel. You didn't come join us for lunch. Why are you avoiding us?"

"...eh," Rex said with a huff. "I ain't like ya, Edwin. I don't make friends that easily."

"This group isn't going to allow that for an answer," Koyo said. "I only met Joey less than 24 hours ago and he let me tag along with them."

"Ya but me and Wheeler have a history... me and Mai too."

"Mai is getting better," I commented.

"I've noticed," Rex admitted. "You've worked some magic on her, to be sure."

"More getting her to see that being a mirror is better than just automatically attacking people... or using them." I glanced at Rex and nudged him slightly. "Want me to help you trick her out of her room? Payback for Duelist Kingdom?"

Rex smiled at that but shook his head. "You just want her in your bed."

I bit my tongue because I almost told him that I already had that. After last night... well, I doubted Mai's bed would see much use for the rest of the tournament and I didn't mean because of Marik putting her in a coma (and that made my heart pound just a touch harder; no matter what I wasn't going to allow that bastard to put my girlfriend in the medical wing). But as had happened the other times I had become intimate with someone a shyness invaded my thoughts. I didn't want to brag. I didn't want to bring it up. I didn't want anyone to know. Not because I was ashamed of her... quite the opposite. What we had... it was special. Where other people would have screamed to all that they had slept with her I wanted to pull that knowledge tight to my body and never give it up. To keep it just between the two of us.

So instead I commented, "I'd suggest you find someone to warm your bed but the choices are kind of limited. Tea is spoken for, Yuri I might just have to grill you over..."

"And Koyo here only has eyes for Wheeler."

Koyo sputtered at that.

"H...how?" he finally got out. "How did you know-"

"You think I don't recognize someone trying to figure out if their crush is into the same sex?" Rex asked. Koyo stared at him, befuddled by that, and Rex finally declared, "I'm bi."

"...fuck," I muttered. "I'm sorry about that with Tea and Yuri, I didn't-"

"Bi, Edwin, not gay. Garnder ladies are fine. So's your girl. I just like looking at Taylor and Devlin as well." He shot me a dark look. "That not a problem, right?"

"I'm heterosexual but I'm adventurous enough to admire the beauty of a man," I stated. "My percentage isn't' enough to make me Bi but I definitely am not 100% straight." I paused for a moment before adding, "Also keep in mind that half of the people I work with at KaibaCorp would use the Duel Disc system to fuck the monsters. Guys liking guys and girls liking girls is literally nothing."

"...fuck the monsters?"

"Some of your dinosaurs they would love to call daddy."

Koyo just kept staring at Rex. "Do... do you think Joey-"

"Wheeler can't even figure out what he's interested in, let alone what other people desire." Rex shook his head. "He lusts after Mai but the way he admires Yugi? And the less said about him and Kaiba the better! That sexual tension is so bad it makes me sea sick... or feel like I just spent the day jerking off."

"Lovely," I commented. "I didn't need that picture in my head, Rex."

"Me jerking off or Kaiba and Joey together?"

"Both," I stated before looking at Koyo, who looked a bit upset over that information that Rex had dropped on him. I couldn't blame him, of course... I'd be upset too if someone said the person I was crushing on was sexually attracted to a rich attractive industrialist. "Don't worry about Kaiba, he isn't straight or gay."

"You sure?"

Rex scoffed. "Kaiba is asexual."

"He's Blue-Eyes White Dragon Sexual," I commented.

Rex considered that. "Fuck, you might be right."

"So you have a chance with Joey."

"I... I don't know if he-"

"Rex is right," I said. "Joey... you just met him so obviously you might get to know him better and decide he isn't worth it. But something to keep in mind is he was dealt a shit hand in life. His mom divorced his dad and decided to abandon him to that drunk, knowing what he was like." I sighed, running my fingers through my hair and wondering how the hell I had ended up as Captain Stubing on the KaibaCorp Love Blimp. "I'm not going to sugar coat this... he probably will react badly at first. Freak out, be disgusted, all that. Because if he is Bi-"

"He is," Rex said firmly.

"If he is Bi," I said stubbornly, "then he has most likely had his father drilling it into his head for years that being gay makes him less than a man."

"Edwin?" Rex said when I grew quiet.

"Sorry," I said after a moment. "Just realizing I haven't lived up to my promise of getting Joey the fuck out of that place." I had thought about trying to get Joey emancipated but Battle City had delayed that... I knew I needed to get back to work on that.

'And,' a dark part of my mind whispered, 'if his father did more than just be a vile drunk... make sure another safe gets dropped in the ocean.' Out loud I said, "Listen, I just want you to understand... it could get really bad when you tell him. Really bad."

Koyo's shoulders slumped.

"But if it does who cares?" Rex said with a scoff. Koyo and I turned to stare at him, confused, and the dino duelist huffed. "Come on... if he acts like a massive jerk and never apologizes that just means you dodged a massive bullet. You really want to be with someone like that? Hell no... Wheeler turns out to be a bigot and you can celebrate the fact that you didn't end up with the asshole." He chuckled a bit, eyes shut as he shook his head. "Honestly that's the benefit gay people have over straight... straight people don't have that litmus test to figure out if the person they want to be with is hiding being a massive vile tool."

"...litmus," I said, "rather big words you are throwing out there Rex."

"Fuck you, Edwin," Rex said but with no bite. "I'm on the honor roll. I know I just look like some dumb punk but I'm smarter than anyone gives me credit for."

"I'm coming to see that," I admitted before looking over at Koyo. "Are you okay? I know that all-"

"No... no that is good advice. You two a right... I need to be ready for Joey to react badly." He paused. "And hope maybe he won't."

With that Koyo walked off.

"Poor bastard." I shook my head. "He has it bad."

"Not fully straight?" Rex asked.

"To be fair my evil counterpart from Earth-2 suggested we blow each other. Of course he also wanted to fuck our female counterpart so I think he's just a degenerate but he is be..."

Rex just stared at me for a moment. "The sad thing is I can't tell if you are being serious or not about that."

"Remind me to tell you about Mai being a goddess... and I mean that in the most literal sense."

"...the fuck?"

"Welcome to the madness, Rex. Wait till you notice the filler arcs."

~MC~MC~MC~

Chaosverse Omake

Earth 212

'And this is how I die. Not because of some deranged ninja overlord. Not because of some brain alien thing. Not because of alien triceratops. I die to some two bit thug.'

If she weren't scared to death April would have laughed.

It had been entirely innocent. While heading home from visiting the boys she'd seen some idiot drunk get into his card, slam into one vehicle as he tried to get out of his parking spot, and then run over a woman when he'd jumped the curb. The police had arrived quickly and the man at the wheel had ranted and raved that he hadn't done anything. And to her surprise the cops had looked ready to let him go. It was only when she'd stepped forward and said she saw the whole thing that they had slapped the cuffs on the guy and the look they'd given her when they'd done so had been... off putting. Sorrow. They had felt sorrow.

April hadn't understood till two days later, when a van had pulled up to her just a block away from her place and yanked her inside, a bag tossed over her head and zipties locked around her wrists and ankles.

The drunk had turned out to be "Angry" Timmy Falone, son of "Quiet" Sal Falone, the last of New York's old school gangsters. While the Foot Clan and the Purple Dragons had done much to drive out the old criminal organizations the Falone Family had remained and been slowly building up their power. Quiet. Doing all to avoid notice. The police and the Mayor's office knew of them, of course, but they also know of their long reach and thus did little about them. And April had just gotten Quiet Sal's son tossed behind bars.

And thus how she found herself in an old dock house near the Hudson, tied to a chair as the two goons prepared the cement that was going to encase her feet.

She tried to hold out hope that the guys would find her. They'd saved her so many times. But this was different. No chance to leave a clue. No mystery they were already following up. No boasts from the bad guys to get their attention. The gangsters didn't even care about the turtles. They just wanted her dead.

April was coming to realize that they were about to get exactly that.

'Guys... I'm sorry,' she thought, doing her best not to begin crying. It was hitting her that this was it and it was terrifying her but she refused to-

Something darted along the rafters.

"What are you staring at?" one of her kidnappers asked and April cursed herself for giving away one of the guys' location only to start when a figure in a white hooded coat suddenly leapt down, slamming his palms into two of the goons. They went down instantly, without making a sound, and April's eyes widened as she saw that whoever her savoir was... he wasn't one of the guys. "Hey!" the goon in front of her snapped, grabbing her chin and forcing her to face him. "I'm talking to-"

He went ramrod still as the hooded figure struck.

His blow was... odd. He slammed his palm into the man's face but even then it didn't fully connect. April got a brief look at a furry hand with webbing along the bottom of each finger before the figure suddenly jerked back, the goon letting out a gurgle as he fell, a hole in his throat that bubbled with something purple and sinister looking.

"Are you okay... April?"

"Yea," she said, taking more of the figure before her. His face was mostly hidden by his hood but there was no hiding his duck-like beak. He had a broad body that, judging by the tuffs she spotted along his cuffs, was covering in short brown fur. There was a beaver-like tale that stuck out of the back of his white jacket. But most startling was the long bone-blade that emerged from his wrist, which retracted back into his skin within seconds. "How... how do you-"

"April!"

She sighed in relief as she heard Raph's yell, looking up in time to see him and his brothers leap down, weapons at the ready. Realizing what was about to happen she quickly called out, "He's not the one that took me! He saved me!"

"You mean it?" Leo asked, not bothering to sheath his swords.

"Just a friend," the new mutant said. "Very confused how I ended up here and as a platypus but a friend."

And years later April would always look back at that first meeting and shake her head that it was because of a drunk that the Turtles gained an Assassin.

INTRODUCING GIORGIONE "Gio" CHAOS

The Not Quite Teenaged Mutant Assassin Platypus