BXBX NOVEL Chapter 177: Sage.
Chapter 177: Chapter 177: Sage.
"What do you mean you can\'t do the shoot today?" I rubbed my forehead in exasperation after picking up the call from Taylor.
"I can\'t help it! I got two big zits popping out this morning!" Taylor complained, aggrieved.
"Can\'t they be covered with makeup? Or are they volcanic ones?" I asked with a chuckle.
"Ummm... I don\'t want to answer that question. Anyway, we\'re not going to shoot it today!" she said decisively.
I sighed and secretly felt thankful that I had decided to plan the MV shooting early. Even if the shoot was delayed today, the company would still have three more weeks before the music video release, so it wouldn\'t stress out the staff as much.
"Alright. Hmm..." I furrowed my eyebrows as I came to a realization.
"What\'s with the groan?" she asked.
"I suddenly realized that I have nothing to do today," I replied honestly. "Want to come over?"
"..."
She was silent for a while, and then said, "W-While I want to come, I will not do it today."
"Hmm? Why not?"
"I DON\'T WANT YOU TO SEE MY ZITS!"
I laughed out loud after hearing her complain. Then, my doorbell rang. As I was talking on the phone, I called my dad, "DAD! Someone\'s at the front door."
"Can\'t you get it? I\'m shaving." He shouted from the bathroom.
"I\'m on the phone." I said with a slightly loud voice.
My dad then sighed and went to open up the door while I talked with Taylor. I laughed and said, "You know. I suddenly thought of something."
"What do you think about?" Taylor asked, intrigued.
"I can give you an \'employee\' benefit."
"PERVERT!" Taylor laughed out loud as she heard it.
I smiled and then teased, "I\'m not talking about that kind of \'benefit\', although I won\'t reject you if you want it. I\'m talking about a true Employee benefit."
"Huh? Also, still you\'re still a pervert. But, huh?" She was confused.
I was actually talking about my [Beautifying Massage] skill. It was one of the earlier skills that I had gotten, from a Murim universe, where everything was settled with internal energy and techniques with long names.
As I was too busy with my career, this skill, and a lot of other skills, were buried because of my schedules.
My dad suddenly whispered as he walked towards me, "Edward, a pretty woman is here to see you."
"Huh? Wait...You had never called a woman pretty before." I narrowed my eyes at him suspiciously. "Who is it?"
Taylor heard what we were saying. She asked urgently, "Who? Who came to your house? Why is a pretty girl coming to your house!? Are you dating someone?"
My dad replied to my question as he couldn\'t hear Taylor, "She didn\'t say much, but she said that you will know her from her nickname, \'Sage\'. Also, she said to come to the door quickly, or she will bonk you on the head again."
"GOTTA GO!" I said hurriedly to Taylor and ran to the front door in excitement, jumping over the sofa instead of going around.
As I opened the door, I froze. The woman had slightly bronzed skin, deep big eyes, a petite figure, and a scowl on her beautiful face.
"Ana De Armas?" I muttered in confusion.
"Well, I just look like her," Sage replied. "Aren\'t you going to invite me in--"
Before Sage could finish her words, I hugged her suddenly, causing her to freeze. "My benefactor!" I shouted in excitement.
"...You have one second to release me," she warned.
I smirked and then said, "No." She sighed and let me indulge in my longing for a while, hiding a slight smile on her face at the same time.
As I released her, she said, "You know why I\'m here?"
My eyes suddenly dimmed. "I know. I did something wrong--"
"I need your help to fix something for me," Sage interrupted before I could finish my sentence.
"Huh?" Both of us looked at each other in puzzlement.
"What are you talking about?" she asked.
"I... What are YOU talking about?" I threw the question back at her.
"I\'m talking about the \'Great Sage\' cult that has been scamming people. I need your help to destroy it."
My heart beat quicker, but I kept a poker face. "Why?"
Sage then sighed and confessed, "Well, after you created the Wikipedia entry, I went to check on them so that you wouldn\'t miss any details. You did great. I\'m really proud of you."
"By the way, the internet is a disgusting place. I don\'t recommend you stay there for long," she said with a slight grimace.
"What websites did you encounter?" I asked with a slight chuckle.
"I don\'t want to talk about that. In all of my 3000 years of living, I have never been so disgusted with the way two girls were using one cup."
I widened my eyes, but Sage continued before I could react, "Anyway, some people were interested in the history, so..." She squirmed a little bit and grew abashed. Her cheeks blushed, and she couldn\'t look me in the eye.
"Well... They were interested, so I added a few details, but I hid my presence."
"IT WAS YOU!!!!???" I widened my eyes in shock. "I thought it was me who started that cult!"
"IT WASN\'T A CULT! IT WAS TRUE! But... Yeah, I started it," Sage replied with a slightly mischievous smile.
I froze for a while, and then let out a sigh of relief. "So, it wasn\'t my fault," I muttered to myself.
Sage was confused, "Hmm? Of course, it wasn\'t your fault. Anyway, I\'m breaking a few rules by appearing in front of you, so we need to make it quick. I need you to wipe out all of the bad things related to my name! Can you do it?!"
I smirked, "And...What do I get for helping you?"
She scowled, "What do you want? Oh right, have you had any sessions yet after mine? I had already submitted the request for the list, so you can see them at your next session."
"Ohh. I haven\'t had them yet." I replied before I got back to the topic, "Nice try trying to distract me. It won\'t work. Let\'s see...what do I want from you?"
Sage tapped her foot nervously and then said, "Quick. I can\'t be here for long. I need to wipe out your memory of me being here as soon as I\'m gone."
I was startled, "Wait? Really? You need to do that?"
"I don\'t need to. But I\'m trying to get out of work. If they know I broke a rule, they will send me on a mission, and I will have to move my old bones again. You don\'t want me, an old lady, to work so hard, do you?"
My dad was walking by at this moment and heard Sage call herself an old lady. He gave her a puzzled look but didn\'t say anything besides, "Are you guys really going to be talking at the front door? Ed, she\'s your friend, right? Invite her in."
I finally realized how rude I had been and said, "Oh right. Come on in, Sage."
"Wait, I can\'t stay for looooonggg–" Sage\'s words trailed off as I pulled her inside the house.
...
Sitting at the dining table sipping tea, Sage calmed herself down. "Ridiculous. Absolutely ridiculous," she complained. "The internet should\'ve never been invented!"
"Sure, granny." I played along as I sat next to her, sipping the same tea. I forced my dad to leave the house, leaving me alone with Sage so that I don\'t have to watch what I was saying.
He did give me a concerned look, but apparently, he misunderstood my relationship with Sage. He thought that she was a niece of the grandmother I told him about before because he heard the word granny a few times. I wouldn\'t know about this until he came home last night, and I don\'t have the thought of clearing it up even after.
"Hmmm..." She groaned. I smiled as I looked at her face. Suddenly, she said, "Edward. I can sense you\'re anxious. What is going on?"
"Can\'t you know it without me telling you?" I joked.
She then paused, "I can... Do you want me to do it?"
I was the one who was taken aback this time. "Ummm... I don\'t know how to answer that."
"Are you anxious about your \'future\'?" She asked knowingly. "You don\'t have to stress yourself out. When the time comes, you will be able to sense it."
"Oh..." I replied before I grimaced, "That doesn\'t make me feel better."
"Believe me. I understand what you\'re feeling."
I instinctively wanted to reject her sympathy, but then I realized she wasn\'t saying that just to make me feel better.
"You really do, don\'t you?" I said.
She nodded and then changed the subject, "Anyway, instead of dwelling on it, just make sure that you always pay attention to your surroundings."
"Ah, Sage. I want to ask, why did you give me the last draw? You know, the one with the One Piece memory." I asked her with a smile on my face after throwing all of my doubts to the back of my mind.
"Hmm...No. That\'s just your luck."
"Sure it is." I muttered sarcastically.
"Can we not talk about things that will give me troubles? Can you help me or not?" She said anxiously.
"Oh. I already did it last night." I muttered casually, causing Sage to widen her eyes in disbelief.
"Wh–"
"So, you should change your purpose of coming here. You come to visit me, nothing more."
She contemplated for a while, and then smiled widely, "Yeah. I just came here to visit. I\'m not interfering with the mortal world\'s business at all–"
"If you dare to wipe my memory, I will be sure to spread bad words about your history again!" I warned her as I saw she wanted to snap her fingers. I didn\'t know what was going to happen if she did, but I\'m not going to find out.
She scowled and then said, "Alright. I\'m leaving."
"Can\'t you stay for a while longer? It\'s not like we\'re going to meet again, right?" I asked while flashing my puppy dog eyes. Surprisingly, Sage was weak to these kinds of attacks and sat back down.
I smiled and then asked her, "You know, I haven\'t had a conversation where I don\'t have to mind what I\'m saying for a long time."
Sage nodded in understanding, and she let me pour out my resentments for a while.
"You know, I would only have to wait...like 10 more years before One Pieceends. But instead, I need to add another 14 years to my waiting time. Really, Sage, I can\'t thank you enough for giving me the Wano ending."
"I have a lot of skills. What am I supposed to do with them exactly? Sometimes, the indecision makes me feel paralyzed."
"And don\'t get me started on the relationships around me. Although I like my family and friends, there\'s still a voice whispering in my head that says I don\'t deserve this."
Sage listened intently to all of my complaints for a while. She gave me a couple of chicken soup for the soul, but honestly, it all sounded generic.
"I can\'t help it, okay? I\'m already retired!" She retorted after I looked at her with disdain. "But I can say this. Take a deep breath and calm down. Sure, starting fresh can be scary, but it\'s not like you\'re doing something bad, right? Just adapt to what life throws at you, like you always do."
"So stop overthinking. It won\'t do you any good."
I nodded after hearing the advice. For some reason, talking with Sage for half an hour fixed me more than 10 hours of a therapy session. I hope that she wouldn\'t charge me for this.
After I showed her that I had cleaned up the traces of the cult and punished the perpetrators, she was finally satisfied with my work. It was a bit disheartening after she said goodbye and left, but I didn\'t know why, I got a feeling that we would see each other again soon.
...
[General POV]
Walking away from the neighborhood, Sage wore a satisfied expression on her face. Suddenly, a gray Porsche drove by and came to a halt beside her. From the driver\'s seat, a Korean man emerged – Mr. Gong Shin, senior Afterlife agent. He lowered his sunglasses and greeted Sage with a smile.
"Did I get caught?" Sage asked, maintaining a poker face.
"Yes. It\'s rather pointless to disguise yourself when you used a character that isn\'t supposed to exist here," he said teasingly. Reaching into the passenger seat, he picked up a few files and handed them to Sage.
"Here. You\'ll find your new identity, housing, company credit card, insurance, savings account, and everything else you need, including your background in terms of familial relationships."
Curious, Sage asked, "What do I need them for?"
"Well, to live here, of course, and to act as a monitor for our newbie agent. I was struggling to find a replacement for \'Mrs. Henderson,\' but you inadvertently did me a favor and broke a rule. Since you already have a rapport with her, why not take on the role?"
The senior agent chuckled, while Sage scowled in response. Putting his sunglasses back on, he added, "Good luck as an intern teacher at Palisades High. And, oh, as a bonus for your troubles, I\'ll compensate you for dealing with those horny teens later on. Bye bye~"
The car swiftly drove away, leaving Sage to process the sudden turn of events.
"Damn it!" she exclaimed, unable to contain her frustration. "I don\'t want to be a teacher!" she shouted, but the senior had already disappeared around a corner.
...
Dad returned home after buying the groceries, but was puzzled when he saw I was alone in the house.
"Did she already leave?" He asked in disbelief.
"Yes. 15 minutes ago." I replied casually.
Dad looked at the groceries bag in his hand and asked, "Then, did I buy all of these for nothing?"
"I wouldn\'t say \'for nothing\'. I\'m cooking tonight." I replied with a smile before I ordered, "Put them all in their place."
My dad didn\'t say anything and went to the fridge, "Been a while. And oh, Luke has been coming by all summer, wanting some cakes."
"Really? He asked you?" I looked at my dad with disbelief.
"Not quite. I don\'t know how he managed to sneak into the house, and when he saw that the fridge was empty, he scolded me and told me I need to do better."
The story made me burst into laughter. I went to check up on Renaldo, my manager Randall, and also Pepper before I do anything. However, it seemed that Pepper already knew about my MV shoot being canceled, so he just asked me to spend some time with my family instead. After all, it was a Sunday.
*Ding Dong*
"Who is it?" I asked after finishing lunch with my dad.
"It\'s Luke!"
I opened the door, and Luke walked into the house without minding me. "I got a new game, Zombie Madness." He said in excitement.
"Nice." I replied, not minding that the game was rated mature. "How did you get it?" I asked curiously.
"Hey, are you asking me questions, or are we going to play?" Luke replied dodgingly.
I nodded and said, "Want to bet on the game?"
"Mom said that we shouldn\'t gamble." Luke replied, "But dad said something we can if it\'s with your friends."
"You should listen to your mom." I said with some concern about Luke\'s future. As we played the game for a while– of course with me kicking Luke\'s butt every time, his dad actually invited me to jump on the trampoline today, and play trampoline basketball!
I went to Dunphy\'s house after changing my clothes. "Ed. Think fast!" Phil said as he passed the ball to me as he saw me entering the backyard. I managed to catch the ball perfectly and smiled smugly, "Luke told me you had never let him win. So today, prepare for your demise!"
Phil chuckled, "Oh, game on!"
[Phil\'s commentary]
"To be honest, that scared me a little. It\'s not like I\'m afraid of losing. But I\'m afraid of the super dad image that the kids have of me collapsing. So, I just have to give 200% of what I got in the match today!"
[Commentary ends]
Haley and Alex were standing at the veranda when Alex shouted, "DAD! Kick Ed\'s butt!"
Haley shouted, "Ed! You can do this!"
I smiled and wanted to look cool by dribbling the ball. When I bounced the ball for the first time, I suddenly realized...I was bouncing the ball...for the first time! My previous self has never played basketball before.
The ball bounced on the grassy yard weakly, and bounced away while I was frozen at my spot.
Alex and Haley burst into laughter after they realized what had just happened, and even Luke and Phil were being gigglish.
"Shut it! I just need to adapt!" I said with a blush on my face before I tried that again. I did it perfectly the second time, but still, I couldn\'t regain my face.
I had to play the game on the extremely bouncy trampoline, with a super energetic middle aged man that wouldn\'t let me score no matter what.
"Damn it...my image." I cursed to myself as I saw Haley and Alex laughing at me from afar. Even Claire joined the fun, and rooted for me in sympathy a few times.
Soon, I finally got used to the rules of the game.
"Woo-hoo! Slam dunk!" Luke shouted as I managed to jump on the bouncy trampoline and dunked the ball.
Phil\'s mouth was smiling, but his eyes weren\'t. "Nice shot Ed. Okay, it\'s Luke\'s turn now."
"Huh? I just need two more points to win–" I was confused.
"Cute that you think that. Time\'s over!"
"Wait, we were timing it?" Luke asked, as confused as I am.
"We are! I told you about it before we start! Now come on Luke!" Phil said, wiping his forehead sweat. I narrowed my eyes at him in suspicion, but as I saw Luke was excited for his turn, I just relented easily and went down the trampoline.
Phil breathed in relief after he saw me go.
[Phil\'s commentary]
"Phew! I\'m lucky that I\'m quick witted. Honestly, what\'s with that kid? He\'s like a beast unchained! He\'s like the white Michael Jordan...You know, if Michael Jordan played trampoline basketball."
"Anyway, I\'m not letting him beat me so soon! I\'m like a hyena, protecting my meat from other vultures. And the only way I\'m going to let Edward eat my meat, is when my wife and daughters are not around!...Maybe we can do it in private."
[Commentary ends]