BXBX NOVEL Volume 5 34 So-called Wife Is Not My Wife
Volume 5 Chapter 34 So-called Wife Is Not My Wife
"Fuma, have this one, and then try this one."
The usual graceful, generous and esteemed Princess Jingan\'s tone was soft and delicate enough to give the impression that she was trying to tickle my heart, yet was also akin to a grain of rock sugar dropping into a flame to become a sweet flavour that was sticky.
Jingan was somewhat excessively passionate tonight, while my body wanted to draw the line.
I had refused… but they seriously tasted very good; plus, I was hungry… As such, I pathetically ate everything she fed me. When I occasionally licked her finger, hot flushes would surface on her pretty face, but she\'d continue feeding me, nevertheless.
The atmosphere was incredibly awkward. Jingan looked at me with a gaze hinting at her passionate desire to go further. So accordingly, I could only rely on chewing to hold down the fort…
As I chewed, I recalled the past and the reason I ended up with her.
To explain how Princess Jingan and I ended up in this relationship, I would need to backtrack to three years ago, when I was still active in the pugilistic world.
Three years ago, I was twenty five, and had been involved with a good number of major matters in the pugilistic world. At the time, the Divine Moon Sect had already been plunged into tragedy, and I was thinking about where to go from there. It was then that the Emperor announced to the world that he wanted to select a Fuma for Princess Jingan through an Imperial Martial Arts Tournament of the same nature as the most recent one.
At the time, I was in Nanjing and uninterested in the announcement. Not long after, the victor was announced. Legend had it that the victor had reached the apex of martial arts and possessed unmatched literacy competence. Every member of the imperial court was astonished at his display and marvelled at how such a perfect individual could possibly exist. They remarked that only one with such talent was worthy of His Majesty\'s most beloved eldest Princess, and therefore conferred him first fuma of Yuansheng Dynasty\'s reign, Fuma Jingan!
According to what I knew, Fuma Jingan was indeed an outstanding martial artist who would unlikely find a match. However, said person wasn\'t me; rather, he never was me from the start, but… my shi! Fu! That damn old geezerrrrrr!!!!!
It was a ridiculous mess that was beyond ridiculous.
Way back then, my shifu heard that I was in Nanjing, and hence, came to pay me a visit. For the sake of avoiding people (enemies, lovers, female fans) from recognising him, he wore on a set of clothes he reserved specifically for courting girls and wore on a mask made from human skin to disguise himself.
Unfortunately, he passed by a bar before he met me, he coincidentally ran into Princess Jingan who, at the time, was dressed as a commoner. Her magnificent beauty caught his eyes. His lust fired up, and thus, he actually had the audacity to go and hit on her!
My shifu\'s skills at hitting on girls are at the apogee of picking up girls art. Utilising his skills, the two began to cheerfully get along. Princess Jingan actually had dinner with him three on three occasions. My shifu began to become very fond of her through their conversations. Somehow, he learnt from Princess Jingan\'s maid that Princess Jingan was going to get married, and the groom would be chosen in the ring.
My shifu didn\'t have any suspicions in spite of hearing that the ring would be set up in the palace. He thought Princess Jingan was the daughter of a noble family. Subsequently, he went and signed up to compete for a kiss from the maiden. Only after he won did he realise that he seduced the reigning eldest Princess.
Thus, the problems started. After he discovered Princess Jingan\'s true identity, he immediately ran. The reason for that was very simple. First Shininang, in other words, Shifu\'s first wife, was the Empress\' younger sister, thereby making him the Emperor\'s brother-in-law. Therefore, Princess Jingan should\'ve addressed him as \'Uncle\'.
Even if he was to do something more preposterous, he would know that it was no longer a joking matter. Sadly, running away was very hard. At the time, The Ultimate Three were at the imperial court. If he ran away from the marriage, he\'d anger the Emperor. When the Emperor got angry and sends men after him, there\'ll be no end to his troubles. Even if he wasn\'t worried about losing in combat, the incident itself was embarrassing enough as is! Faced with an emergency, Shifu, therefore, pulled me in to bear the responsibility when I was just passing by the damn place!
On the day they were to get married, Shifu suddenly found me. He forced me to change, did up my appearance without any explanation, and then dragged me into the palace… Only when I arrived at the palace did I realise that the bastard was making me repay his philandering debt!
On the day, I panicked as I asked my shifu, "Wait! Going through the ritual, I can handle, but what about consummating the marriage?"
Shifu laughed in a weird tone, and then with a perverted demeanour, said, "Do you need me to teach you even that? Obviously, you pick up her two luscious white legs…"
"Get out of here, you damn geezer!"
What could I do, though? In the end, I had to come up with some reasons. On that night, when we entered the room to consummate our marriage, I ad-libbed to the Princess, who I met for the first time, "Princess, it is not that I do not want to establish a genuine husband and wife relationship, but the style I practice is a daoist\'s secret, authentic, highly-advanced, pure internal style called The Most Perfect Square Has No Corners The Loudest Sound Is the One That Cannot Be Heard Giant Pearl Purple Wrinkle Invincible Art. One of the commandments of the style is that I cannot have intercourse with a female within a timeframe of several years. If I do, my blood, qi and true qi shall flow in reverse, thereby leading to death…"
"Such a concept exists?" Hearing that, the Princess lowered her head with disappointment, "Fuma, you are not making that up to trick me are you?"
"There is no way I would do such a thing. Princess, you are the incarnation of a fairy deity. There is no man in this would who would not love you. Unfortunately, due to my training in The Most Perfect Square Has No Corners The Loudest Sound Is the One That Cannot Be Heard Giant Pearl Purple Wrinkle Invincible Art, I must not be intimate with women."
"Why did you approach Jingan, then?"
"Erm, well, it is not that I can\'t touch women at all. I just need to be willing to give up all of the results of my cultivation and erase it before I do. That said, Princess, a man must put the nation before everything else. I still want to do my part for the nation to secure our father\'s world! As such, I cannot erase my own cultivation. Once I have accomplished myself, I will naturally forego my martial arts and give you my embrace."
"Fuma!" Jingan was moved to tears by my speech, "How long do we have to wait, then?"
"Erm, as a man, I need to make a trip around the world. At the very least, I need to settle the Southern border, clear the Northern desert, subdue the West and obliterate them all. Otherwise, I would have lived a life in vain, would I not?"
Jingan poignantly lowered her head. She stopped to think for a moment before looking up with her beautiful eyes, "All right. I shall wait. I have a condition, though."
I immediately asked, "What condition? What condition?"
Hot flushes appeared on Jingan\'s pretty face. The stench of love lingered in the air. She squirmed around as she drew circles on my chest with her smooth white hand, "You have to sleep holding me every night… otherwise, I won\'t be able to sleep; I\'ll have nightmares."
Subsequently, I hugged a fireball and waited for the sun to come up while lying there in loneliness…
"Fuma, Princess."
The elderly female servant\'s voice cut off my train of thought. A woman, who looked healthy and approximately forty, stood at our door. She was the elder female servant that was with Jingan and responsible for miscellaneous jobs. Jingan usually called her \'Mama Liang.\'
The abode I went to was the fuma manor that the Emperor rewarded me with. It was far inferior to the Princess\' short-stay palace in Hangzhou, but it was large enough to house a family and its servants.
Mama Liang lowered her head. In her hoarse voice, she said, "The room is ready. Please head there now Fuma and Your Highness."
"Fuma, let\'s go, we…" Jingan\'s beautiful eyes swam around on my body a few times. She exuded her charm as she uttered word by word, "Turn… in… now."
Notes:
*Ming Feizhen\'s "The Most Perfect Square Has No Corners The Loudest Sound Is the One That Cannot Be Heard Giant Pearl Purple Wrinkle Invincible Art," is a combination of text from Confucius and gibberish that he added in. In case it escaped you, he\'s using it as a lie.